The Funny Bone: Week 06
Young and Old
One day at a park when a shy boy was only 5, his mother introduced him to another boy about the same age as her son.
Knowing that her son felt uncomfortable starting conversations, she asked the other boy how old he was?
He looked at her in amazement and said, "I'm too young to be old".
Children's Letters to God
Dear GOD, Who draws the lines around the countries?
Dear GOD, Thank you for my baby brother, but what I prayed for was a puppy.
Dear GOD, I bet it is very hard for You to love everybody in the whole world. There are only 4 people in our family and I can never do it.
Dear GOD, I would like to live 900 years like the guy in the Bible.
A child's safety song (Tune: My Bonnie Lies Over The Ocean)
My body has Calamine Lotion, my body's as sore as can be,
The flowers I gathered for Granny. Turned out to be Poison I-vee!
Don't touch, don't touch,
You'll get a rash from I-vee! (I-vee!). It will... itch bad...
And it looks worse than ac-nee!
A salesman phoned and asked 4-year-old Josh who answered the phone if he could speak with his mother.
Josh: "Mother's not home."
Salesman: "Is there anyone else at home?"
Josh: "My sister's here."
Salesman: "May I speak with her please?"
Confused, Josh: "I guess so." At this point there was a very long silence on the phone.
Salesman: "It's still you. I thought you were going to call your sister?"
Josh: "I did. The trouble is, I can't get her out of the playpen."
One day, a girl looked at her mother's hair and with a sad voice said: "Mom, why is some of your hair white?"
The mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The girl thought about this revelation for a while, and then said, "Mom, how come all of grandma's hairs are white?"
A mother was trying to get her son to eat spinach (which he hated). He absolutely refused to eat it.
So, thinking she would substitute another green vegetable that was just as nutritious, she served him asparagus.
When he looked at his plate, he gasped in fright, "Oh, no, spinach legs!"
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